ENGLISH LANGUAGE - THANKSGIVING REPRISE - ENTER CHRISTMAS

This and/or similar observations of our English language circulate the Internet, but I find this one uniquely, partially set to rhyme. As it came the circuitous route of "forwards" no author was listed. Just in case there is one, apologies for no attribution.

An Ode to the English Plural

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,

But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.

One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,

Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.

You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,

Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,

Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,

And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?

If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,

Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and there would be those,

Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,

And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,

But though we say mother, we never say methren.

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,

But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!

Let's face it - English is a crazy language.

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;

Neither apple nor pine in pineapple.

English muffins weren't invented in England

We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes,

We find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are

Square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing,

grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend?

If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

[N.B.:  I would call it the odd one at the end.
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English,
Should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.

[N.B.:  Maybe we were, and just don't know it.]

In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?

We ship by truck but send cargo by ship...

We have noses that run and feet that smell.

We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.

And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,

While a wise man and a wise guy are opposites

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which an alarm goes off by going on.

And in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop? 

No wonder it is difficult for legal immigrants to learn the language before they can become American citizens! --NitWit1

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After a lovely meal with church friends who have embraced us in the tradition that the Christian belief teaches, and, later, an afternoon and evening watching my favorite sport, football, where most of my favorite teams won, I read a few chapters of my current book, TALE OF TWO CITIES.

This is a rather dark setting of two cities, London and Paris, during the French Revolution. Despite its ominous setting, it is a characteristic of much writing during this period that I term morality themes, mostly how human beings treat each other. In this story, it was less that decent--in fact downright evil.

Afterward, I reflected how thankful many of us are who live in countries, where human decency encompasses compassion for us when we err, even court systems which provide a decent trial of peers. It is by no means perfect, and sometimes errs in its decisions, but it is the best that man has determined.

The setting is 1775 and the "American problem" is vaguely mentioned in the TALE.

My reflections included my personal year of frequent mountaintop to valley experiences, the wonderful vacation despite my infirmities, our humble contributions to those less fortunate than myself, the deepening of my health problems, and the continuing joy of having found fellowship in a caring church family after searching most of my life, which may be no reflection on any certain church as my finding some peace within myself.

Some facets of these experiences have been shared with you, often with humor pointed at myself. Once in a while I whine, but laughter at my own infirmities and shortcomings is far more palatable.

Now we are entering the season of remembering the season where emphasis is good will and giving which are supposed to reflect the message of the belief, not only of the Christian belief, but also other beliefs.
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Now, with this long soliloquy finished, I am now transitioning Christmas Season which all to often becomes frenzy, madness, depression and utter lack of its original intent.

We feel most blessed to have arrived at old age, with reasonable stability, to be able to share with those who have not been so blessed. We have changed our focus over the past years to a far more gratifying mission of spending more of what we allotted to so called Christmas frenzy, to the many opportunities help others anonymously.

We have settled into a routine of (1) adopting a Christmas Wish family (more description) later, (2) assisting in fulfilling the needs of 3 families our church Life Group adopts from area schools, and taking close friends to dinner so we all enjoy friendship, (3) taking a few personal couples to a special restaurant for good food and fellowship. (4) Decorations are nil. (5) Christmas Day-duel solitude and reflection. (6) Gifts?

These ideas are further detailed below -if you care to read them:

(1) One of the charitable ventures we choose at Christmas is sponsored by the area daily Baxter Bulletin newspaper of Mountain Home, AR called Christmas Wish. The program started as a way to manage needy persons who slip through the usual charities to find some help. It mushroomed so greatly, it was morphed into a charity whose goal is to provide families with children some semblance of Christmas. Their entire focus is on children, other than some food provisions.

Christmas Wish  participation may be in several ways: (1) adopt a wish, (2) provide items needed, (3) volunteer. Therefore, persons who do not have sufficient funds participate in some way, like volunteering--always needed, or buy some only a  few items that may be needed by dozens of wishes.

How they do it I don't know, but the 400 plus wishes will be fulfilled in some measure before Christmas Day. I love this program, because it gives people several ways to contribute--not just money and shopping. They always need more volunteers who have time to help sort, the multitude of merchandise given them, sorting gifts, calling the families requesting help.

We have chosen to adopt a family this year. My husband picked one family out of the 400+ letters submitted. The family had one boy and two girls, and wanted help with a Christmas dinner as well as clothing and reasonable personal list of items for the children. The program has shopping guidelines  for those who adopt a family which makes the adopted families wishes conform similarly to those not adopted. anonymity is carefully guarded.

My husband (H) picked the Christmas Wish letter he wanted to adopt. Being childless, we are not accustomed to selecting clothing, much less toys. He picked one that the children were older and did not have a long list of toys.

H did his shopping early for the boy-having no trouble with a male teenager. He finished on a couple of hours one morning, and picked up one more item later.

Now to my shopping trip on Black Friday. No, I did not participate in any midnight sprees. A decade ago I did stand in ques to fight over deep cuts in merchandise, often on ourselves vs. the true spirit of giving.

A decade ago I did stand in ques to fight over deep cuts in merchandise, often for ourselves vs. the true spirit of giving. But I did venture to the king of merchandising, WalMart on Black Friday afternoon to shop for a family we adopted via a very successful charity established by our area newspaper.My trip caused more angst and anxiety, than pleasure, as I obsessed on being sure I got the appropriate requests an sizes right.

 I can barely shop clothing for myself being very short and chubby. The females on our Wish request were a subteen and barely a teen, both, apparently large. I drove the ladies at the dressing room desk nutz! nutz! nutz!, before I left. I also bought two, what I perceive to be, wallets for them. Then I had Best Friend (BF), who works for the Baxter Bulletin, re-check my purchases the same evening.

Sunday BF and I returned to WM for one additional "feminine" gift for the girls-makeup kits. This week we will carry our bounty to the Christmas Wish center for distribution.

(2)  Our Life Group has adopted three families, one from each of three schools in our area. H an I provide a fully cooked Christmas Dinner boxed by a local grocery chain. We bought 6 which is 1 extra, and one for us. We have given funds for other in the group to shop. We also contribute to the purchasing of gifts, while blessedly we have others who like to shop, usually in Branson, and wrap packages.

A Life Group shares in all facets of a project. Some cannot provide funds themselves, but they will shop, or wrap packages, deliver, etc. Some are able to do many things. We choose to give monetarily on gifts, but have tackled some sticky problems like last year we found a good used bicycle for boy. H cleaned it up and touched it up. We happen to know a citizen who renovates bicycles. Everyone shares as they can; no one is judged by what they do, or don't do.

(3) Then we take some couples from our circle of friends to dinner at a well-known fine restaurant, instead of buying gifts. This way we have the joy of their fellowship and friendship. This has proved more satisfying than gifting.

(4) After years of storing and putting decorations outside and inside, we gave away most of our outdoor decorations to a neighbor with children. We can enjoy them from afar. They live behind us. I put up two tabletop LED Christmas items, IF there is a clean table for them. If not, no big deal.

(5) Christmas Day, we lounge around, and I cook a box precooked Christmas turkey from local grocery chain. It has servings for 8-12, which we share around the neighborhood and with best friend, who is food editor where she works. She COOKS all year, as anything she prints she first runs a trial effort. Not to cook a huge dinner for two is relaxing, and she probably enjoys a day from doing work, but she does love to cook. Occasionally, we have all bought dinners at the local VFW, too.

(6) After years of trying to get appropriate gifts for each other, a couple united from diverse heritage, education and culture, we agreed to personally purchase one "gift" for birthday and one for Christmas. These are not necessarily done at the specific date, nor is there any price limitations. However, I usually mention my choices. My birthday is Oct. 13 but this year I purchased a new lens for my camera in August so I would have it for our Sept. vacation. Christmas will probably be a camera body which will also fit the same lens. No doubt this purchase will be made after Christmas.

And if something else pops up, we help, too. This goes for the whole year. Yes, we have been scammed a few times, but we learn to discern, without judgment.

For me personally this year, my part in these efforts has been somewhat tiring, but it is a pleasant "tired." 

Hanging over our heads is the limitation the present heart medication is effective has expired; I can tell the next step, whatever it may be, is looming, probably this coming year. I have had a few fibrillation episodes through this drug routine, but they have been short. The episodes are becoming longer but so far, no more frequent.

I hope to be back with another episode from our trip, probably the Badlands.

BLESSED THANKSGIVING - FAMILY AND FRIENDS







Bountiful Thanksgiving
[Broderbund ClickArt]

For all who cross my post today, I wish you Peace, Gratitude and Blessing. Whatever your or my lot in life today, I realize many in my own town, maybe my own family, my country, and, by extension, the planet, who are not as fortunate as we are.

As we observe an age old tradition, not only in America, but other countries have rituals of Thanksgiving, too,-- may we go forth tomorrow to embrace the larger world of family and friends, especially those who need us, too.

Interestingly in our language Family and Friends both begin with F. In my life there have been those where the line of definition is all but the same, and I feel doubly blessed.

BLESSED THANKSGIVING DAY FOR ALL WHO READ POST TODAY.

-- NITWIT1 & LUCKIE of Coward's Corner with Luckie.

A TALE OF TWO CITIES AND TWO WOMEN - PART 2

Deadwood Street Scene and Trolley

The second city is Deadwood, South Dakota and its woman of note is commonly known as Calamity Jane. While Dorothy Hulstead might be universally viewed as an inspirational, devoted wife with a common sense idea that grew wings, Calamity Jane defies defining with adjectives, yet in some moments of her life, she, too, inspired some groups of people.

Deadwood Hotel Awnings

Deadwood is National Historic Landmark whose early highlights were 3 Gs: Gold, Gambling and Gunpowder, all of which created both real and legendary events immortalized in books, movies and tales regaled from generation to generation.

In 1874 the presence of gold was the principal attraction which drew people to the area, and precipitated gunfights and gambling. The news of gold seems to spread even overseas to places like Scandinavia. After all America was always the 'Land of Opportunity!' Gold was found in a gulch filled with dead trees and a creek full of gold; thus Deadwood was born.

Mustang Sally's [We Ate Hot Dogs Here]
[Husband's photo]

There were few restrictions mining gold; people of all stripes and persuasions found themselves striving for a piece of the action from bull train freighters, Chinese laborers,  hard rock miners, cavalrymen, merchants, madams, gamblers, merchants. Some came to mine or pan for gold and others came to cause the fortune finding miners to part with their prized findings.

In nearby Mount Moriah Cemetery many victims as well as some famous outlaws found a final resting place. A short list of legendary characters include Wild Bill Hickok with Calamity Jane buried next to him.

View From Our Outdoor Table
At Mustang Sally's

Other legendary personalities were Madam Dora DuFran, Potato Creek Johnny, Preacher Smith, Seth Bullock, Al Swearington and Colorado Charlie Utter. All created legends as much as history; it is difficult to sort it out fact and fiction.

Wild Bill Hickok came seeking fortune, but died at the hands of gunslinger Jack McCall in  Saloon #10 while holding a poker hand of aces and '8s', forever after known as Dead Man's hand. Besides his exploits making him a folk hero, he was a peace officer. Hickok was famous for his accuracy with a Navy revolvers, his weapon of choice.


Deadwood Street Scene - Colorful Storefronts


Although linked with Calamity Jane, any infatuation was on her part, not his; Hickok is reputed to have disliked her more than a little bit. She is buried beside him, supposed as a perverse joke by those who laid Calamity Jane in her final resting place. Although she claimed a child by him as well as marriage there no reliable records supporting the claim.

Here We Are At The Stockade;
Guess We Didn't Pay For
Hot Dogs
{Passerby Took Photo]

Deadwood's famous woman was Calamity Jane, a.k.a. Martha Jane Cannary Burke, born in Princeton MO, then Virginia City MT, Salt Lake City UT and Piedmont Wyoming. Her parents died early, leaving Calamity Jane in charge of 5 other siblings. At or near age 16 she worked whatever jobs she could to feed her siblings and herself: dishwasher, cook, waitress, dance-hall girl, nurse, ox team driver and finally scout at Fort Russell. Also in this time frame she was an off/on prostitute at Fort Laramie Three-Mile Hog Ranch. (This link is quite interesting, too.)

When you compare the lives of Dorothy Hustead and Calamity Jane, most of us would probably hope we compared favorably with Dorothy, at least I would. Yet I am a tad ornery and suspect there is a little more than I would ever admit of Calamity Jane in me.

Deadwood Brick Street
[Husband photo]

Her unconfirmed claim to the name Calamity Jane is she rescued a Capt. Egan before he hit the ground after he was shot in an Native American uprising. However, she was known to prefabricate and/or exaggerate stories about herself. This is her story and no evidence exists she and Egan were ever together in any unit. 


Deadwood 4-Way Stop

Even when her parents were alive they seemed to move a lot across the western frontier without putting down permanent roots anywhere she could call home. She lived by her young wits, growing up  without tutelage among men who were often interested in their own immediate pleasures.

She gained fame claiming to be an acquaintance of Wild Bill Hickok and a professional scout fighting Native Americans. Her infatuation with Hickok was not mutual according to others.

Besides gold prospectors there were the Indian Wars, a wild frontier, some of which was yet to experience statehood. As she matured she was also known to show extraordinary kindness and compassion to the sick and needy. Education wise she was illiterate, so she lived by her own wit, developed by personal experiences.

"Wild Bill Hickok' Outside Saloon 10
[Husband Photo]

The above seemingly at odds personality traits made her both famous and infamous. She wrote her own autobiography, most of it unsubstantiated by facts. Under other circumstances, she might have been a novelist as her imagination and exaggeration of facts, or completely falsified reasoning made for a larger than life reputation of a frontier woman who survived to age 51 by wit and life experience.

View Up A Side Street
Note Deadwood Is Built
On Hill Sides

It is believed she married as many as three times but even that fact is not well documented.
Calamity Jane at least provided fodder for many films, books, music and even a comic book.

So believe such a person did exist, but a historically correct biography will probably never be written, which always seems to be the case for a person who become larger than life, a legend.

Our tour bus deposited us at Saloon #10 which is still  a saloon offering card games and slot machines. A man dressed similar to images of Wild Bill Hickok sits on a bench outside the saloon, talks to tourists and allows pictures to be taken.

Deadwood Building Date with
Decorative Gold Trim

Husband and I were really tired as this was 4th day of touring and we had a banquet still to attend that night. We were content to walk a block or two, eat a hot dog at a outdoor restaurant and observe the unique architecture. Climbing the hill to Mt Moriah was not even given a thought.

The main street is still red brick. The sidewalks are jammed with tourists. I bought a souvenir shirt. We had our picture by a giant statue outside a "stockade."  The architecture  is very interesting.

Most of our group headed to the top gambling spots, so we enjoyed the street scenery. There was a free shuttle bus tour but we weren't sure we'd be back in time for our bus, so we stayed in same general area.

This was our last tour stop and time for reflection. We realized we could stay in that area for a month and see something different every day. Somehow I never thought of South Dakota as a tourism mecca.

'Romeo and Juliet' Balcony
Deadwood -Same Building
As Above w/Gold Trim

Photos by NitWit1, Except As Noted