ENGLISH LANGUAGE - THANKSGIVING REPRISE - ENTER CHRISTMAS

This and/or similar observations of our English language circulate the Internet, but I find this one uniquely, partially set to rhyme. As it came the circuitous route of "forwards" no author was listed. Just in case there is one, apologies for no attribution.

An Ode to the English Plural

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,

But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.

One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,

Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.

You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,

Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,

Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,

And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?

If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,

Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and there would be those,

Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,

And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,

But though we say mother, we never say methren.

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,

But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!

Let's face it - English is a crazy language.

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;

Neither apple nor pine in pineapple.

English muffins weren't invented in England

We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes,

We find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are

Square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing,

grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend?

If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

[N.B.:  I would call it the odd one at the end.
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English,
Should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.

[N.B.:  Maybe we were, and just don't know it.]

In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?

We ship by truck but send cargo by ship...

We have noses that run and feet that smell.

We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.

And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,

While a wise man and a wise guy are opposites

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which an alarm goes off by going on.

And in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop? 

No wonder it is difficult for legal immigrants to learn the language before they can become American citizens! --NitWit1

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After a lovely meal with church friends who have embraced us in the tradition that the Christian belief teaches, and, later, an afternoon and evening watching my favorite sport, football, where most of my favorite teams won, I read a few chapters of my current book, TALE OF TWO CITIES.

This is a rather dark setting of two cities, London and Paris, during the French Revolution. Despite its ominous setting, it is a characteristic of much writing during this period that I term morality themes, mostly how human beings treat each other. In this story, it was less that decent--in fact downright evil.

Afterward, I reflected how thankful many of us are who live in countries, where human decency encompasses compassion for us when we err, even court systems which provide a decent trial of peers. It is by no means perfect, and sometimes errs in its decisions, but it is the best that man has determined.

The setting is 1775 and the "American problem" is vaguely mentioned in the TALE.

My reflections included my personal year of frequent mountaintop to valley experiences, the wonderful vacation despite my infirmities, our humble contributions to those less fortunate than myself, the deepening of my health problems, and the continuing joy of having found fellowship in a caring church family after searching most of my life, which may be no reflection on any certain church as my finding some peace within myself.

Some facets of these experiences have been shared with you, often with humor pointed at myself. Once in a while I whine, but laughter at my own infirmities and shortcomings is far more palatable.

Now we are entering the season of remembering the season where emphasis is good will and giving which are supposed to reflect the message of the belief, not only of the Christian belief, but also other beliefs.
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Now, with this long soliloquy finished, I am now transitioning Christmas Season which all to often becomes frenzy, madness, depression and utter lack of its original intent.

We feel most blessed to have arrived at old age, with reasonable stability, to be able to share with those who have not been so blessed. We have changed our focus over the past years to a far more gratifying mission of spending more of what we allotted to so called Christmas frenzy, to the many opportunities help others anonymously.

We have settled into a routine of (1) adopting a Christmas Wish family (more description) later, (2) assisting in fulfilling the needs of 3 families our church Life Group adopts from area schools, and taking close friends to dinner so we all enjoy friendship, (3) taking a few personal couples to a special restaurant for good food and fellowship. (4) Decorations are nil. (5) Christmas Day-duel solitude and reflection. (6) Gifts?

These ideas are further detailed below -if you care to read them:

(1) One of the charitable ventures we choose at Christmas is sponsored by the area daily Baxter Bulletin newspaper of Mountain Home, AR called Christmas Wish. The program started as a way to manage needy persons who slip through the usual charities to find some help. It mushroomed so greatly, it was morphed into a charity whose goal is to provide families with children some semblance of Christmas. Their entire focus is on children, other than some food provisions.

Christmas Wish  participation may be in several ways: (1) adopt a wish, (2) provide items needed, (3) volunteer. Therefore, persons who do not have sufficient funds participate in some way, like volunteering--always needed, or buy some only a  few items that may be needed by dozens of wishes.

How they do it I don't know, but the 400 plus wishes will be fulfilled in some measure before Christmas Day. I love this program, because it gives people several ways to contribute--not just money and shopping. They always need more volunteers who have time to help sort, the multitude of merchandise given them, sorting gifts, calling the families requesting help.

We have chosen to adopt a family this year. My husband picked one family out of the 400+ letters submitted. The family had one boy and two girls, and wanted help with a Christmas dinner as well as clothing and reasonable personal list of items for the children. The program has shopping guidelines  for those who adopt a family which makes the adopted families wishes conform similarly to those not adopted. anonymity is carefully guarded.

My husband (H) picked the Christmas Wish letter he wanted to adopt. Being childless, we are not accustomed to selecting clothing, much less toys. He picked one that the children were older and did not have a long list of toys.

H did his shopping early for the boy-having no trouble with a male teenager. He finished on a couple of hours one morning, and picked up one more item later.

Now to my shopping trip on Black Friday. No, I did not participate in any midnight sprees. A decade ago I did stand in ques to fight over deep cuts in merchandise, often on ourselves vs. the true spirit of giving.

A decade ago I did stand in ques to fight over deep cuts in merchandise, often for ourselves vs. the true spirit of giving. But I did venture to the king of merchandising, WalMart on Black Friday afternoon to shop for a family we adopted via a very successful charity established by our area newspaper.My trip caused more angst and anxiety, than pleasure, as I obsessed on being sure I got the appropriate requests an sizes right.

 I can barely shop clothing for myself being very short and chubby. The females on our Wish request were a subteen and barely a teen, both, apparently large. I drove the ladies at the dressing room desk nutz! nutz! nutz!, before I left. I also bought two, what I perceive to be, wallets for them. Then I had Best Friend (BF), who works for the Baxter Bulletin, re-check my purchases the same evening.

Sunday BF and I returned to WM for one additional "feminine" gift for the girls-makeup kits. This week we will carry our bounty to the Christmas Wish center for distribution.

(2)  Our Life Group has adopted three families, one from each of three schools in our area. H an I provide a fully cooked Christmas Dinner boxed by a local grocery chain. We bought 6 which is 1 extra, and one for us. We have given funds for other in the group to shop. We also contribute to the purchasing of gifts, while blessedly we have others who like to shop, usually in Branson, and wrap packages.

A Life Group shares in all facets of a project. Some cannot provide funds themselves, but they will shop, or wrap packages, deliver, etc. Some are able to do many things. We choose to give monetarily on gifts, but have tackled some sticky problems like last year we found a good used bicycle for boy. H cleaned it up and touched it up. We happen to know a citizen who renovates bicycles. Everyone shares as they can; no one is judged by what they do, or don't do.

(3) Then we take some couples from our circle of friends to dinner at a well-known fine restaurant, instead of buying gifts. This way we have the joy of their fellowship and friendship. This has proved more satisfying than gifting.

(4) After years of storing and putting decorations outside and inside, we gave away most of our outdoor decorations to a neighbor with children. We can enjoy them from afar. They live behind us. I put up two tabletop LED Christmas items, IF there is a clean table for them. If not, no big deal.

(5) Christmas Day, we lounge around, and I cook a box precooked Christmas turkey from local grocery chain. It has servings for 8-12, which we share around the neighborhood and with best friend, who is food editor where she works. She COOKS all year, as anything she prints she first runs a trial effort. Not to cook a huge dinner for two is relaxing, and she probably enjoys a day from doing work, but she does love to cook. Occasionally, we have all bought dinners at the local VFW, too.

(6) After years of trying to get appropriate gifts for each other, a couple united from diverse heritage, education and culture, we agreed to personally purchase one "gift" for birthday and one for Christmas. These are not necessarily done at the specific date, nor is there any price limitations. However, I usually mention my choices. My birthday is Oct. 13 but this year I purchased a new lens for my camera in August so I would have it for our Sept. vacation. Christmas will probably be a camera body which will also fit the same lens. No doubt this purchase will be made after Christmas.

And if something else pops up, we help, too. This goes for the whole year. Yes, we have been scammed a few times, but we learn to discern, without judgment.

For me personally this year, my part in these efforts has been somewhat tiring, but it is a pleasant "tired." 

Hanging over our heads is the limitation the present heart medication is effective has expired; I can tell the next step, whatever it may be, is looming, probably this coming year. I have had a few fibrillation episodes through this drug routine, but they have been short. The episodes are becoming longer but so far, no more frequent.

I hope to be back with another episode from our trip, probably the Badlands.

Thankfulness

Enter His gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.
For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations.
[Psalm 100:4-5]

No matter our prosperity, or perceived lack thereof, I am sure we can enumerate thankfulness to fill a calendar year. One of the bloggers I follow is listing an item a day of thankfulness. [See Holding Patterns by Sandi].

In a year of less than desirable economic prosperity, 10% unemployment, personal and family bankruptcies, homelessness and all the accompanying trials and difficulties, I believe we still can find thankfulness, so I am going to try to catch up with Sandi with 16 today, and then try to post 1-2 each post weekly until I have 30, hopefully on Nov. 30.

Thankful list:

1. Parents, now deceased, who adopted me and taught and guided me into adulthood with decent moral values, and invaluable education.

2. A husband who puts up with me.

3. Numerous pets who have brought joy into my life.

4. Many friends, wherever we have lived.

5. The privilege of living in a third world country which taught me respect for other cultures.

6.Having a younger brother and sister helped understand value of a family unit.

7. Finding my biological family at a relatively late age is a major marker in my life, plus two more brothers and another sister.

8. Having survived several major medical crises in my life helps me understand the stress such events have on the patient and family.

9. Having the privilege and confidence of local voters to serve my city on city council for 3 terms.

10. The ability throughout life to learn and develop additional skills of interest, whether computers, photography, arts and crafts.

11. The Internet as a tool of learning, research, virtual friendships, communication.

12. To have witnessed a man walk on the moon via television and to remember the introduction of the first b/w television into general markets.

13. To have witnessed my Mother's gifts of one of the first automatic dishwashers, an electric sewing machine, a Bendix washing machine & dryer, electric typewriter.

14. To have witnessed the introduction of computers.

15. To have witnessed our nation undergo two attacks on our homeland (Pearl Harbor and 9/11) and emerge with resolve to remain an united Nation.

6. To remember how our Nation united and backed our President and others resolve during WWII even while still suffering the remnants a Great Depression.

Comments on#16:

I remember sitting by the console Philco radio listening to President Roosevelt's speech after the attack on Pearl Harbor. I did not understand it all, except through my parents I knew it was serious.

I remember Victory gardens and war bonds; we had several of each.

I remember rationing of sugar, tires, and other commodities. Dad became so proficient at patching intertube tires, we grew to expect at least on flat on almost any trip. The longest trip was 120 mi (round trip) to grandparents and great aunts in same town. These trips were infrequent, usually very special occasions.

We had practice blackouts and curfews; there was an Army camp outside our town. I remember driving home from church one night with only parking lights on. When we arrived home we either went to bed or listened to radio in the dark.

Yet through it all I observed more community and national support in so many ways that I do not see today. Women went to work. to help sustain the family. Women and those who were not drafted, or did not volunteer made bandages, knited sweaters, scarves or sock, packed care packages and worked with the USO.

Today I see very limited exhibition of patriotism. It seems patriotism might offend someone. Too bad! At this house we have worn out more flags than I can count. Further, my military retiree husband insists the old ones be properly disposed. Sometimes he does the job or we give the tattered flags to the VFW.

PHOTOS: My sister's driveway entrance in Texas.

Monday, Again - TeleCare - Volunteerism

Monday seems to come around far to soon, a reminder another week of life has past incredibly at the speed of light.

Today was my volunteer day to work TeleCare, a free daily morning phone call to subscribers. Two friends and I formed this group in response to an incident my husband regaled to me.

He delivered Senior Meals on Wheels for several years. In the course of his route he entered senior citizens' homes to deliver the meals. Some wanted the meals in their refrigerator or freezer for later consumption.

One day he entered an apartment to find the recipient on the floor, having fallen several hours earlier. He called 911 for emergency help and stayed until their arrival. During the interlude the lady told him, this was not the first time she had fallen; the last time she fell, it was two days before someone found her.

He planted this seed in our minds. We investigated what volunteers could do and organized TeleCare, loosely organized group of volunteers who work mornings 365 days a year (including holidays) to call those who are fearful of living alone. There is no age limit, but the clientele generally is above the age of 60. We have gentlemen, ladies, and married couples.

Once a year we have a light luncheon for our clientele, so they meet the volunteers with whom they've been talking. Long-time clients look forward to this yearly event.

Some volunteers are brief and there are some who chat a bit longer. The sound of a human voice is reassuring to a lonely person who never hears the phone ring. I'm on the chatty side.

TeleCare is only one tool toward helping persons live longer, independently in their homes.

Invariably, the clients cheer me up more than I probably do for them.

Our small town would be lost without volunteers, such as our Fire (Department) and Police (Department) auxiliaries, hospital and nursing home auxiliaries, churches whose members unselfishly work in our communities, and organizations like Veterans of Foreign Wars, Rotary Club, Food Pantry, Library Friends, and the unsung heroes on every block - neighbors.

There is a nationally sponsored event once a year, called Make A Difference Day. In our town we have many people who make a difference every day--and they are mostly past 50 years of age themselves.

Luckie knows we have persons who check on pets and plants alone at home, while their owners are hospitalized, tending family emergencies, shopping or simply enjoying a rare vacation! Further, she is grateful for the many volunteers who work for the Humane Society and other animal shelters!

On a different note, one of the blogs I read is having a 100th Post Giveaway. If you are interested , please check out Just Sweet Enough .